The Lost

It is with a heavy heart that I write this blog entry.  Today, one of our patients went home to be with the Lord.  It is the first patient we have lost, and it has been very hard for me to wrap my brain around.  As I told one of my friends, this just got real.  I guess I always knew that the people we worked with were sick, but when they are with us, they are happy and excited to be taking an active role in their recovery process.  I forgot that sometimes cancer fights back just a little bit harder. 

This patient we lost today was something special.  She was first diagnosed with breast cancer 16 years ago.  At the time she was given only 6 months to live.  Courageously, she battled her cancer into remission two different times.  This last go around, she knew her prognosis wasn't good, but she fought it anyway.  And if she was bitter about her diagnosis, she never let it show.  Everytime I saw her, she had a smile on her face.  Even while facing the biggest fight of her life, she still found a way to encourage others around her, even me!  Most importantly, she loved the Lord with all her heart.  The first day I met her, we talked for over an hour about how great He is.  She shared with me story after story about how He has helped her through out her journey.  In her 16-year fight against cancer, her encouragement and hope led several people to the Cross. 

This has me seriously examining the ministry of Maple Tree.  When I first heard God calling me into this minsitry, I knew He wanted me to address the physical AND spiritual needs of people fighting cancer.  I have worked hard to get exercise and nutrition services started, but what have I done to really bring people to Christ?  Am I missing the point of this whole thing?

I suppose now would be a good time to share my own testimony with you.  I grew up going to church every Sunday.  I knew who Jesus was, and would often pray to God, asking Him to grant me all my hopes and dreams, but that was about it.  I did not let myself be available to be used by God.  In fact, it was more the other way around - I wanted to use Him. When things didn't go my way, I would pout.  I had been around people who were zealous for the Lord (I usually called them "very religious" people), but would often see some sort of flaw in them that would turn me off from wanting to be like them.  I thought that if someone claimed to love Jesus that much, they should be perfect.  If they weren't, they were a fraud.  I didn't know about grace.  I didn't realize that the Christian walk is just that -- a walk; one that isn't complete until we see Him face to face.  It is only then that we will be like Him.  Until then, we are simply a work in progress. 

So, that was me....Living the dream.  I had a wonderful husband, a beautiful daughter, a great job, a car, a house, even a designer hand bag.  Things were great.  However, in spite of all this good fortune, I could never shake feelings of inadequacy.  I always felt like something was missing.  I didn't realize that we are all born with a God-sized hole in our heart; one that no worldly possession can ever fill.  I was completely and utterly LOST.  Then, in September of 2007, my beloved grandfather suddenly lost his battle with cancer.   A series of events happened immediately after his death that were very difficult for me to deal with, and I sank into a deep depression.  I felt absolutely worthless.  Any relationship I had with God up until that point was over.  I stopped going to church.  I stopped praying.  I simply existed.  Then one day, I felt like God was calling me.  I can't explain it, except that I was suddenly very aware of His presence in my life.  And to be honest, it kind of freaked me out.  I shared this with a dear friend of mine (someone I knew who was "very religious", lol!), and she encouraged me to pray about it.  She even told me what to say.  Over the next several months, God became very real to me.  He healed all the hurt I was carrying and loved me when I was at my most unlovable.  Then, on February 9, 2009, I gave my life to Him.

Why am I sharing all this with you?  What does this have to do with the patient we lost today?  Unless Christ returns, we will all face death someday.  None of us know when our time on this earth will be up.  Our patient was lucky, in that she had given her life to Jesus several years ago.  Today, her faith became sight.  He took her home.  He will be with her forever....Forever!  Eternity is Forever!!  Most of us walk around with 5-year plans, career goals, retirement portfolios, etc, etc...but what about 1,000 years from now?  What about 1 million years from now?  What are we doing TODAY that will impact us then?  How can you be certain that you will spend forever with the ONE you were created for?  The Bible is very clear on this, and luckily, the answer is very easy.  For God so loved the world, He gave His one and only Son.  That whoever believes in Him shall not parish, but have eternal life.  Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life!  Simply going to church isn't enough.  Checking off a list of good deeds isn't either.  We cannot come to God on our own strength.  If we could, then why would God have sent His only Son to die for us?  The Bible says that unless we are born again, we cannot enter the kingdom of God.  Simply having head knowledge of the Gospel isn't enough.  Even demons know who Jesus is, yet they will spend eternity separated from Him.  Jesus desires our hearts.  He desires a personal commitment from us; our acceptance of His work on the Cross for our sins.

Heaven is our home; it is where we were made to live.  On earth, we will never be completely fulfilled, because we were never intended to stay here.  Only through a relationship with Christ can we find true meaning and purpose in our life.  If you are still reading this, then it isn't too late.  You can still make a decision to follow Christ.  Simply pray and ask Him into your heart.  Then get involved in a good church that preaches the truth.  Read the Bible.  Join a Bible Study.  Ask Him to help you.  When we seek him with our whole heart, we will find him.  Do it today, tomorrow it may be too late.